Hey Mom/Mum, you are doing a GREAT job!

Your child is not a mean child. He/she is not even a nice child. Sometimes he/she behaves in ways that might be labelled mean. Sometimes he/she behaves in ways that can be labelled nice. They are just labels.

You are not a mean or nice parent. You are YOU, finding your way in this minefield called loving someone else with all your heart and soul. You are finding your way in loving your partner too. You are finding your way in loving and standing with yourself. 

And you are not alone: take a look around, everyone around you is doing the same. 

Try not to compare your insides with their outsides. You can't see their insides so any comparison you are making is false.

Stand by your Self and hold your hand and talk quietly and gently to that scared self and tell her she is not alone, that you are there with her.

That you won't compare her to others or to any "perfect" ideal of how a Mother should/could/would be.

That you have got her back and that she is not perfect because there is no such thing.  

You are doing a great job, You have changed so much along this journey. You've learned to live with and manage many different challenges in your life already.

Sit in the silence with that compassion for yourself. And hug yourself tightly.

Sarah xx